Now Hear This!

Some abbreviations and their meanings: SSD - Single sided deafness BAHA - Bone anchored hearing assistance Baha Attract - A BAHA made by Cochlear America CI - Cochlear Implant CROS - A hearing system that send sound from one side to another in a person with SSD What's the good news about losing your hearing in one ear? You still have the hearing in the other one! What's the bad news about losing your hearing in one ear? You cannot tell where the sound you do hear is coming from! Ears are amazing, if a bit odd looking. They stick out, they have lots of circular nooks and crannies, they are great for hanging glasses on and they have that perfect spot on the bottom that's just iching to dangle an earring from. And most importantly, ears don't just hear, they hear sounds directionally. Just like two eyes provide depth perception, two ears provide direction perception. The tiny little split second from when your left ear hears a sound compared to when your right ear hears it tells you where that sound is coming from. Ten o'clock, two o'clock, right straight ahead or from behind, this ability is not appreciated until you lose it. It's incredibly unnerving to hear a shout or a bang or a pop or someone calling your name over and over again, louder and louder, and have nota clue where it's coming from. It's amazing I haven't stepped in front of bus. The two solutions for SSD up to this point have been a CROS system or a BAHA. I've tried bot. The CROS gave me terrible ringing, even in my good ear. The Baha Attract works amazingly well if very robotic and tinny, but that localization problem is annoying and emotionally draining. I have two ears, I want to hear from them both. Last year the FDA approved Cochlear Implants for SSD. I emailed my surgeon and expressed my interest. Kaiser contacted me. During a pandemic. To see if I want to have the Baha magnet removed and the CI surgery. Did I mention we're in a pandemic? So the answer for now is Yes, please, that would be totally awesome, but maybe wait until at least all the medical staff is vaccinated? Until then I've started wearing a hearing aid along with my Baha. The hearing aid isn't enough to understand speech with, but I hear sounds from my left ear again and I can discern where they are coming from. I'ts joyous, plus will give my nerve a chance to wake up for when I'll need it again to use the CI. Because I have tiny ear canals and my hearing is so bad, the part of the hearing aid that goes in my ear feels like the size of a Lego, but it's worth the discomfort. What's been my favorite thing to hear? Birds and cruchy leaves. So if you see someone walking around Cottage Creek smiling while looking into the trees while kicking up dry leaves underfoot, that's me. Impatiently waiting for my possible CI surgery.

Pandemic, Painting, Protests and Pectin.

We learn a lot about ourselves when the world turns upside-down. I've learned that in order to keep my wits about me and not dive down into a pit of despair, I need to keep busy. Not just busy like puttering aimlessly, I mean like so busy I can't even think of picking up my phone to check the news because my hands are covered with either dirt, paint or kitchen muck. I started off our March lockdown with lots of house projects, ended up painting the interior of the house, worked a lot in the garden and finally almost permanently attached an apron to my body and processed loads and loads of fruit.

All our abundance was thanks to our fruit trees getting the memo that we cancelled all our vacations and trips this year and that we'd be home. All. The. Time. And then other people with fruit trees had the same thing happen and they had fruit trees gone bonkers too. Once people hear about the couple that welcomes all produce happily into their lives, you become like the fruit dump, but in the best way possible.

First it was our plum trees, We've lived here for 8 years now and never ever have we had so many plums - even the old half dead tree that looks like it needs to be put out of its misery went bananas with fruit. And like I said, we were here. All. Summer. Long. So instead of the squirrels and the birds and the dog getting fat on our plums, we picked it all before that could happen. And then came the huge box of yellow plums from the friend of a friend. And a huge box of pears from another friend. And then our peach tree got all jealous and even though it's still really small, it went to town with a huge crop. And not to be outdone our fig tree got into the act and produced a nice crop too. We can't forget the boat load of onions we received, onions to last a lifetime. I cooked with and chopped up onions in so many ways but still more onions! What to do, what to do?

It was time to get busy canning. As I mentioned, canning hands can't check the news so it was the perfect activity to get my mind off many things out of my control and take control over all this healthy organic produce.

All we needed were the canning supplies, especially lids. What?? The rest of the world was canning too and canning supplies became the new toilet paper? What do you MEAN all the stores were out of lids? How could there be no pectin? That's preposterous! I searched in my stash for any lids and rings and jars like a Depression-era housewife, determined to stock up the pantry for her Vitamin C starved family. I put out the call for any friends who had supplies, and then got on Craigslist. Getting on Craigslist during a pandemic to look for canning supplies was a surreal experience. "I'm not a prepper, but hey I got these peppers..." Bingo, we got some jars with 1976 Bicentennial designs on them, that had sat that long in someones's garage, and a friend snagged some supplies at Walmart and we were in business.

I got jamming making jellies and preserves from figs and plums and pears. I made peach just-about-everything, including my first attempts with peach chutney and peach salsa, even using up all the onions for crying out loud. I even got to use the peppers from the failed tomato garden, It was a wonderfully successful time in the kitchen and now we have our larder full. That's the first time I've ever typed the word larder and it feels really good. People ask me if I want to sell them and OH NO, that's way too much pressure. I really love to give them away to friends who visit, it brings me great joy. We have one more batch of figs to do and I can state that the Summer Canning Season of 2020 is sweet history.

Blogger had finally updated its features, and I admit I cannot figure out how to insert my typical comments under each photo. So feel free to make up some incredibly witty remarks for each of the following photos and attribute them to me. 

The keys to our lockdown

You can learn a lot about people during a pandemic, but that would take a great amount of snooping and lots of judgement calls, so it's much easier to just look inward. What I've learned about myself after 10 weeks of lockdown, which now has lifted considerably, has surprised even myself. Here are some takeaways:


The state of our house

It has been my assumption for many years that I prefer a neat and tidy house because I want it to look nice should someone stop by unexpectedly. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a clean freak and sometimes the layers of dust on the horizontal surfaces in our house have their own zip codes. I'm talking the general tidiness factor that allows a guest to walk in and be greeted with a sense that things are clean and put together and someone cares enough to vacuum and dust on a schedule, if not regularly.

Was I doing that for others? Nope, not at all, I've been doing it for myself all along! No one was stopping by, and if they were they were, it was just to drop things off on the porch and run back to their cars. Yet I still feel compelled to keep things neat and tidy. I'm the person I've been picking up for all this time. It was a revelation to me.

The same thing went for my appearance. While not a glamour queen or anything, I'd thought that when I get dressed in the morning, I'm mostly doing it for others, that I cared maybe a bit too much how others viewed me and what I wore. But I found out during lockdown, when the only ones to see me day after day were my loving and sort of colorblind husband and dog, that I dress for me. Each and everyday, even when there were no Zoom meetings to attend, I got dressed in something semi-normal, put makeup on and fixed my ever growing hair. I can't stay in jammies all day, even in a pandemic, I need a fixed waistband to get my day started.

How I get projects done

The reason I'm not a morning person isn't because I wake up grouchy or in a bad mood. OK, well lately this pandemic has me waking up in a less than cheery state. But the reason I don't get much done in the morning is because I prefer open-ended time frames for anything more than loading the dishwasher or starting a load of laundry.

My job with the school district and my proctoring work is typically in the afternoons, and I didn't realize how much this was affecting my desire to tackle big and little projects around the house. My work isn't physically draining, but the timing really messes with my wanting to start something I won't have time to finish to the bitter (or sweet) end.

Time wasn't much of a factor on lockdown. In fact "all the time in the world" was suddenly handed to us on a silver platter. From fixing a hole in the ceiling that's been there since we moved in, to painting the bathroom, the mailbox, the shutters and anything that wasn't moving, to cleaning out the garage shelves and hauling bricks in the yard - lots got done. Our yard is all ready for company, even if we aren't. Starting a Zoom English class for my Moldovan friends? That one has been a total kick. Time is a gift, and I was a very happy recipient.

I'm not a panic eater after all
Along with the whole toilet paper thing, pandemic snacking seemed to be a big topic of discussion. When the realities of the coronavirus first really hit, for once in my life eating did not become an avenue of distraction or comfort for me. In fact, I lost my appetite for most of the things I love, which was good because I was in no mood to brave the line at Trader Joe's for my "must haves" of peanut butter, chocolate covered anything, Norwegian Seed Crackers and avocados.

With nowhere to go and all those days of open-ended time ahead of me, I found I was enjoying cooking more than ever. We sat down to so many meals together, even breakfast on the porch as we watched the neighbors walk by. To my incredible surprise I put on a few live cooking shows for friends and I didn't burn anything. We ate like kings - whole-food plant-based kings.

I loved shutdown. There I said it.

Trying to be a sympathetic friend, I listen and read as people have expressed how much they miss getting together with friends at restaurants and parties, or just grabbing a cup of coffee together. I mentally reach down inside to see if I still have a heart, because honestly I have been completely enjoying this time. If you could have the shut-down minus the death, sickness, fear, and economic devastation, I'd say "Stay Home Directive - How long can we keep this up?"

Our street was so quiet, we met neighbors we've never even seen before, and when they asked how we were, we knew they really wanted to know how we were. We sat on the porch more than we have in the seven years we've lived here. There was an unexpected calmness about life amidst the chaos, and part of me, well a huge part of me, doesn't want it to end. My friends' kids and my congregation and my hair salon, bring those back. Alright, maybe sidewalk salons and al fresco meetings. And travel in a floating bubble with no TSA lines. And teleporting to Chicago. All the other stuff can trickle back in as slowly as it wants, if at all.

Some keys to my success, should I ever face something like this again:

First, I tried not to have a cow about staying home.
We had food, water, shelter, rice and beans.
And a dog, who might have enjoyed it if we'd had a cow.

Putting first things first was the most important step.
Not just an important step, but a historic one. 

I had this positive guy with me.

And this positively adorbs pup, who got more walks than ever before.

We planted our pandemic garden.
It's like a Victory Garden, with much less know-how than generation's past.
Grow garden grow, it means less trips to the stores!

When we did venture out, we masked up.
Or we painted, whichever you prefer. 

Our front yard was a plethora of purple.
White shutters look better with purple than the old brown ones.

If you want your hair to grow out, have them close all the hair salons.
Works every time.

Should there be food shortages, we've got the whole calories and scurvy thing covered.

Green smoothies just about every morning.

Happy meals are super good for you.

We rediscovered the joys of delivered produce.

Rest is key to staying balanced. 

Veggie burgers to the rescue!

We ate some most interesting and tasty meals.
Exactly why do I run to the store so often?
Because now I know so many errands are completely overrated.

When I got super stressed about the news, I cried.
Then I made masks, because it's hard to cry when you're sewing. 

Projects large and small became the focus of our attention.
We tackled some major stuff, and minor things too, because
it's better to view your home as your castle rather than a prison in lockdown.
We spiffed up the castle, with more to come.

Finally, we spoiled this little Flower Pup rotten.
All the dogs, and some of the people, wish Stay-at-Home would go on and on,
but it can't and won't.
But we can sure come out of it better people with a stronger sense of what really matters.
Faith - Family - Friends - Furry Things

Sweet Potato Black Bean Chili, an Accidental Delight

My husband's only complaint about my cooking is that I often accidentally come up with a hit, and I can't recreate it. A little of this, a little of that, some produce I threw in because it was on its way out, plus half a can of something I found in the fridge. It all becomes a yummy dinner that we'll never have again, because I didn't pay attention to what I was dumping in.

Enter the coronavirus pandemic, where I've been doing either live cooking demos on Instagram or filming them to upload to IGTV. I first started doing it to stay connected with friends, but then realized I really enjoy it. They aren't professional by any means, I still have yet to upload the one where the bottle of catsup sprayed all over me.

I videoed myself making some sweet potato black bean chili, explaining in no uncertain terms that this wasn't prize winning chili, just something healthy for the two of us. And what would you know, it turned out great. Really really tasty. So I watched again my little of this, little of that measurements to see what I could see. Here is my best attempt to document what went into this  yummy and healthful vegan chili.

Sweet Potato Black Bean Chili

1/2 onion, chopped

2 or 3 carrots, chopped

1 small or 1/2 large red bell pepper, chopped

2 ribs celery, chopped

6 small or 3 large sweet potatoes, peeled and chopped

2 cans black beans, undrained (I used low sodium)

1 can chopped or stewed tomatoes

1 large can black olives, chopped

1 bag frozen corn (or one can)

1/2 small can tomato paste

1/2 cup canned pumpkin (optional)

2 cans of water (using the black bean can to measure)

1/2 teaspoon garlic powder

1/2 teaspoon chili flakes

1/2 teaspoon black pepper

1 teaspoon cumin

1 teaspoon chili powder

1 teaspoon dried oregano

2 teaspoons all purpose seasoning

1/4 teaspoon liquid smoke flavoring (optional)

salt to taste (optional)

Put all ingredients in an Instant Pot or electric pressure cooker, stir together and cook on high pressure for 6 minutes. Let the pressure release naturally.

Or put all ingredients in a slow cooker and let simmer for 8-10 hours.

Enjoy!

That was it. Super easy - dump and go. The spices are most likely very flexible, this wasn't spicy at all, just rich and delicious. Jazz it up to make it hotter if you like, but I was letting the sweet potatoes shine. They did!

Get out your big spoon!

Super tasty the next day, with a beer.

Waiting for the first shoe to drop

It all developed so slowly. It's hard to put a day on when the real impact of the global pandemic hit me. This thing we all refuse to call COVID19 (4 syllables) and instead call the coronavirus (6 syllables) came like the slowest tsunami ever, and we haven't even seen its full crest.



Back at the end of January I got a call for a last minute trip to Chicago for work. I scrambled to get packed and ready, not too hard because for this job I've been there so many times I know what's expected. All black clothes for work, warm stuff for outside, but not too warm because I spend most of the time inside the vast McCormick Center which is connected by corridors to my hotel. Five nights of luxury broken up by brutally long working days and a couple chances to see my friend Roxy and visit the Romanian congregation in Skokie.




The day before my trip a young friend who was following the story emerging from Wuhan China asked me if I was afraid to fly, especially to Chicago, where there was a case of this new virus. No, not afraid to fly, not afraid of Chicago, just afraid I'd miss my 4:30 am wake-up call if I was sleeping "deaf-side up." We contemplated buying an Apple watch with a buzzer so I could rest easier. Ran out of time for that, instead I set my phone alarm for 4:30, 4:31, 4:32, 4:33 and so forth. I found out the hotel still does wake up calls too.




There were some really bad technical difficulties with the test which I can't go into. Suffice it to say we worked the longest day I've ever worked (5:30 am - 11:30 pm) with the most disappointing results. We were being careful with hygiene because it was flu season, but nothing special. Little did I know when I flew home, that was going to be my last flight for a long time. I sat by a young man coming back to his brother's funeral from suicide. A most draining and gut-wrenching conversation filled the majority of the trip home. I arrived back completely spent in every way.




The next Monday I had jury duty selection and was forced to sit by a young woman who was coughing and hacking and snorting and sniffling in my limited breathing space. I tried looking for another seat, but I couldn't and had to sit by the hacker. Sure enough, four days later on a conference with my husband in Santa Rosa, I got a doozy of a cold. Fever, sore throat, upper respiratory infection big time. I ended up with double pink eye and an ear ache, with feeling like I'd been run over by a semi. It took me very long to recover. In the midst of the fog of this virus, I could sense that this mystery virus in China wasn't just in China anymore. It was spreading. My calls in to my doctor for the pink eye and earache were met with many questions about where I had traveled and did I have a dry cough. The answers were Chicago, that blasted courthouse, Santa Rosa and bed, and not a dry cough, mine was a bit wet.




With each half week came more and more bad news, more and more people were getting "it" (one syllable) as we now all call COVID19. Photos arrived from our friend in Seattle who works at Costco of people racing down the aisle to hoard toilet paper. The news was filled with TP, sanitizer wipes, paper towels and death in rest homes. And we thought the craziness had peaked.




The rest of the dates are getting jumbled. We began to rethink the whole "kiss, hug, kiss again, shake every single hand of every single person" at our Romanian meetings, filled with the most kissy-huggy-shaky-handy group of friends you've ever experienced. I started washing my hands more, way more, especially since I had recently been so sick. Then I just started refusing to kiss, and introduced the fist bump and then the toe kick. Then we had our last physical meeting on March 7. We thought it would be for 2 weeks. It's now been 3 weeks and will most likely go on this way for months.


How are we keeping our unity? First we watched streamed talks and meetings from Romania. But then we got direction that we were still to meet as a congregation, but on Zoom. I had never heard of Zoom before. Now it's a regular part of my vocabulary. We have Zoom meetings with our congregation, and it's simply adorable to see these older immigrants taking to this great technology on their ipads and iphones. We are learning how to mute, stop video, raise our hands, upload a nice photo and we're memorizing everyone's pictures hanging above their sofas. But most of all we are staying united, encouraged, upbuilt and connected. Zoom is the best invention of our times. Let's all give a big sanitized gloved hand for Zoom.


About the time I was completely over my cold from February, and in the middle of making marmalade, my husband told me he had a sore throat, wasn't feeling well and was going out to the trailer to self-quarantine. My heart sunk, every muscle in my body began to tingle and I wanted to just curl up into a ball and cry. But I had marmalade bubbling in pots and I had to deal with it. By the time they were in their jars I had calmed down. My thinking process went from total dread to "This isn't a death sentence, this isn't Ebola, he will be OK, and worst case scenario I have stellar examples of friends who have faced the worst of the worst of losing a mate and they are still functioning as beautiful giving people who have true purpose in life". From now on, when I get some bad news, I'm going to make marmalade, because the process got me from an emotional fetal position to standing tall and positive by the time the lids make it on the jars.


During all of this, in addition to Ernst self-isolating in our trailer, we had no bathroom except for the one in the pool house and the one in the trailer. A leaky toilet had led to a stained floor which led to pulling it up to investigate which led to discovering mold which led to finding out it was really bad to tear up a bathroom during a pandemic. "Boo hoo, poor me, no inside toilet!" Again, an attitude adjustment was in order, as I walked out in the dark with my flashlight to use the loo. "Jessica, this is all some people have or know or experience their whole life. Buck up and deal with it." I should have made some more marmalade. Finally after 12 long days the dad of one of Ernst's students agreed to come and put in our new floor. Yippee for floor guys who also set toilets! We were flushing again by the time Ernst was better.


In amongst the growing tragedy this epidemic (now pandemic) has wrought, life goes on. Never did I think San Francisco would order a lockdown of its citizens. "Those poor people!" I thought. Then a few days later my county, Sacramento, got a similar directive. It seemed so drastic, so scary, so unbelievable.


Then we just got used to staying at home. We had enough food, we never hoarded, we just prepared. My motto is "We aren't preppers, we are preparers." We basically lived on beans and rice before this started, the only hard part is getting the amounts of fresh produce we consume. We signed up for a farm box delivery, can't wait to see what it contains.


Our days consist of eating real meals together at our table, spending lots of time with our dog, Zooming with our congregation, getting more stuff done around the house than I ever thought possible and trying not to look at the news while still staying informed. At this writing, we don't know anyone personally who has it, and I hope that stays the case until the experts nail down the best "drug cocktail" to hit this with.


We are eating extremely healthy, our goal is to keep our inflammation down and our blood flowing freely through every artery, vein and the tiniest of capillaries in our bodies. I'm not going to binge eat junk food, even vegan junk food, right before what might be my body's most important fight ever, surviving COVID19. We continue to eat a low added fats, whole-food plant-based diet heavy on the greens and vegetables. Since I'm only working the morning shift on weekends at my school district job I have so much time to mindfully plan meals around the food we have. I'm quickly learning how to enhance frozen vegetables to make our fresh last longer.


Our biggest question now is did Ernst get a very mild version of the virus? He said the back of his throat was a color he had never seen it, it was purple. And his tonsils looked very odd too, with ominous streaks of veins coming off them. Of course we can't know, they aren't going to waste a precious test on someone who only had mild symptoms. It just would ease my mine to know this guy who has survived so many health scares got through this one with just a week of self-imposed isolation.


Without that knowledge, we are just staying home as much as humanly possible, staying connected with our friends and while taking precautions, knowing the picture is much bigger than our little home, our little home with the big backyard and the modest supply of toilet paper. So if you run out of legumes, we can share. But don't come knocking at our door for TP, all we'll hand you is package of frozen collard greens.


Until next time...Stay safe, Stay smart and Stay HOME.

Stay connected

Stay strong

Stay kind

Stay clean

Stay healthy

Stay protected (from paint)

Stay bright

Stay sane (dryer balls in dog food?)

Stay determined to eat the food you already bought

Stay realistic

Stay spicy

Stay masked when necessary

Stay exercised



Stay busy

Stay hopeful we will soon be back with our friends

Stay home!